My name is ALeeta. I am a 56 year old domestic violence survivor and still am working out a lot of trauma that has come from this horrible crime. Without me writing about that scene I want to concentrate on why I stayed accepted and stayed in domestic violence for many years. For me to cope I gravitate to learning all I am able to about who, what, where, when and why these tragedies occur. Without a doubt, as clear scientific evidence and research proves that homelessness and poverty go hand in hand helping people to feel unworthy about themselves, to the extent where little self esteem and worthiness is barely intact. Therefore, for me growing up as an orphan and not having that bond, nurturing and attachment that infants and kids need to survive in this ever changing world, it’s always been survival for the fittest type of thing.
Children’s brains cannot function because their hierarchy of needs were never met producing mental illness in the sense of having a difficult time coping and meeting the demands life requires of each individual, rightly so. Nonetheless, I did not have the skills to be able to do simple things and I have relentlessly passed these issues down to my kids. They too have gone down this pathway to destruction, if you will. Knowing triggers helps and seeing a counselor helps to remind me of the vital things I need to continue working on for the rest of my life. To some those things are not an issue but for me those things can take over my life and destroy me and all my healthy relationships if I do not continuously stay on top of self care. Taking care of me is a priority over others. The worst thing I can do is believe that I am unworthy because I am important too. That is what I battle with everyday. I have a MAEd and many more degrees and certificates yet its just now I feel like I am beginning to understand more fully because of all the research is now available and is exciting to know that I can make a difference in others lives in turn makes a bigger impact in mine knowing my life is not a waste. Thank you for reading.
WRAP and Recovery Books is the division of AHP’s Human Potential Press that publishes books and materials about WRAP, wellness, and recovery.